“Living Apart Together” or LAT relationship
January 18, 2009 – 11:06 am
Some Baby-boomers are concerned about complicating their inheritance, particularly if there are children and step-children involved.
By: Natasha Morgan
One day over coffee my good friend Jane and I were discussing relationships. Since we are both divorced Baby-boomers and carried a fair amount of baggage, we were able to keep this conversation going for quite some time.
“Would you ever get married again?” I asked Jane after she told me about the new man in her life.
“Good grief girl, nobody gets married these days” was Jane’s immediate reply.
While the trend toward relationships without marriage seems to be on the rise in Europe, Australians have also jumped on the bandwagon. North Americans are a little slower to get started but the trend is well on the way.
Some Baby-boomers are concerned about complicating their inheritance, particularly if there are children and step-children involved. Others may want to have the freedom to live on their own terms.
If money is not an issue and both partners can afford to maintain a home, it may be easier than learning to compromise at this age. Even couples who have much in common, may find every day togetherness challenging.
Researchers have coined the phrase “living apart together” or LAT relationship to describe the unconventional set-up that is growing more popular among people of all ages.
While Jane is content with her LAT relationship, it’s not for everyone. Some feel that intimacy is lost with this type of an arrangement. Also, there is security in having a resident caregiver in the event of illness or accident.
Proponents of LAT say they enjoy the freedom of choosing when to spend time with a loved one and feel that it keeps the relationship fresh.
Fortunately, in a free society we can make our own decisions on what lifestyle suits us best. Where the problem can arise is when a potentially well-suited couple is unable to agree.
This article was written specifically for notjustthekitchen.com.
It can be copied provided the content is in no way altered and the following link remains active: Read more articles geared toward women.Read Seattlepi Blog: Baby boomers who plan to remarry need to take financial action before they wed
Photo: .craig
6 Responses to ““Living Apart Together” or LAT relationship”
this is very good,and it is the what they call the today.I am a 46 year old divc. woman,for 7 years now,and i have been in relationships with men that had been marryed.We both stood in the same place,yes it is nice living together no kids the been there and the done that.It really is a wonderful place to be at this time in my life,its all about you and your mate.Our kids are 24 and ! Happy Vita M. King no grand kids Happy !
By Vita M. king on Feb 4, 2009
Many of us who are divorced and have grown up children are enjoying the freedom and are reluctant to marry again.
By rita morgan on Feb 11, 2009
the problem arises when he doesnt want to visit my place and wants us to only visit his He has 3 children from previous relationship living in the same town sharing custody. I have 4 children living with me form previous relationship. we have a baby together. he wont come over to my house with his kids -he sometimes comes over alone to see baby when kids are all in school- we have to (the 4 kids, baby and me) travel 45 min to visit with them (he and his 3) ANY IDEAS WHY??
By ida brown on Apr 16, 2009
Case 1
A man….One week stays with one girl, next week stays with other girl, next week stays with 3rd girl. No one stays in his house, he stays at girls’ house
This relationship called “LAT Relationship” ?
If not then called ?
Case 2
A man…Ask his gf stays with him, she has her belongsing at his room. She stays for weekend. Working days, he asked other girls for sex when gf is not here. He is not allow any girls stays his place
For his gf can called “LAT Relationship” or not?
For other girls can called “LAT Relationship” ?
If not then called ?
By Alex on Jul 24, 2009
i in 7yr rel wit 2 kids 2 partner, i hve 2 older daughters (1 living with us) d other flatting, he has 3 otha chn 13yr daughter & 18 yr son to one mum and 22 yr old to another. The blended family has become 2 much for me… i just want my space wit my daughters … he makin it diff … i think i shd jst go n do it n explain LAT
By gillian moon on Jan 24, 2010
Yikes… that’s a lot of family to blend.
You obviously need to make a change to keep yourself sane. Maybe seek some advice from an expert. You could risk breaking up the relationship. Are you prepared for that?
By rita morgan on Jan 24, 2010